The Holy Easter of Sateru is a mammoth, efficient nation, ruled by Santa Claus with an iron fist, and remarkable for its enslaved workforce, irreverence towards religion, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 7.071 billion Satis are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Industry, with Administration, Defense, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Environment and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Styxia. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 13.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Sati economy, worth 804 trillion golds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Woodchip Exports, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an impressive 113,800 golds, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,028,534 per year while the poor average 1,513, a ratio of 679 to 1.

Internet moderators work overtime to remove memes comparing Santa Claus to cartoon bears, children are strong-armed by police into eating their greens, the upper class have been throwing riots after hunting was recently banned, and children are encouraged to chase pigeons. Crime is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Sateru's national animal is the bat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Titan worship.

Sateru is ranked 308,186^th in the world and 12^th in Astoria for Most Cultured, scoring 12 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.