The Grand Duchy of Schaarloon is a mammoth, cultured nation, ruled by Grand Duke Albrecht III von Schaarloon with an iron fist, and remarkable for its soft-spoken computers, compulsory military service, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 6.636 billion Schaarloonians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Neu Halberstadt. The average income tax rate is 29.5%.

The thriving Schaarloonian economy, worth 532 trillion Estoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 80,164 Estoes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.8 times as much as the poorest.

The government loves seeing the little people fight, Grand Duke Albrecht III von Schaarloon is refusing to make decisions until the Moon is out of Capricorn, there has been a series of riots between local cannibals and health food advocates, and search-and-rescue organisations are the biggest employer in the country. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Schaarloon's national animal is the Golden Eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Roman Catholic Church.

Schaarloon is ranked 97,609^th in the world and 1^st in The Alliance of Absolute Monarchs for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 3,320.63 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.