The Watchfires of SW-1 is a gargantuan, efficient nation, notable for its otherworldly petting zoo, public floggings, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 20.735 billion SW-1ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. The average income tax rate is 47.4%.

The all-consuming SW-1ian economy, worth a remarkable 2,115 trillion $$s a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Woodchip Exports, Information Technology, and Tourism. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 102,047 $$s, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.6 times as much as the poorest.

Skateparks can be found in every city, this year's comedy award has left mothers-in-law seething, a fashion designer has been arrested for inciting hatred after claiming redheads couldn't pull off vermillion, and a shipwreck is everyone's fault but the captain's. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. SW-1's national animal is the Dolly Varden, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

SW-1 is ranked 48,381^st in the world and 1^st in Lanai for Lowest Crime Rates, with 74.65 law-abiding acts per hour.