The Republic of Teddy Swims is a mammoth, cultured nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, pith helmet sales, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The hard-nosed, hard-working, devout population of 5.018 billion Teddy Swimsians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Atlanta. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 44.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Teddy Swimsian economy, worth 568 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 113,341 dollars, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 506,629 per year while the poor average 15,726, a ratio of 32.2 to 1.

The nation is stuck in permanent election mode as politicians demand constant do-overs, lonely people are supposed to be cheered up by the many parties that they are never invited to, nobody thinks that the Godfather was bettered by Part 2, and public transit is widely considered to be perpetrating the patriarchy. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Teddy Swims's national animal is the Polar Bear, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Teddy Swims is ranked 257,272^nd in the world and 5^th in Georgia for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -4.38 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.