The Colony of Tristans is a large, cultured nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 140 million Tristansians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The tiny government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Welfare. The average income tax rate is 8.7%.

The Tristansian economy, worth 7.45 trillion papers a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 53,226 papers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.9 times as much as the poorest.

A ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect, the government is seen to favor traditionalist religions, TV shows must meet strict ethnicity quotas, and small children are learning a lot of new words from a teacher with Tourette Syndrome. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low. Tristans's national animal is the brook trout.

Tristans is ranked 87,171^st in the world and 45^th in Cumberperry for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring 2,386.41 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.