The Holy Empire of Vasilinople is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Emperor Andronikos V with an iron fist, and remarkable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, zero percent divorce rate, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 22.643 billion Vasilinopolians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vasilinople. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 19.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Vasilinopolitan economy, worth a remarkable 5,580 trillion Hyperpyrons a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 246,458 Hyperpyrons, with the richest citizens earning 6.0 times as much as the poorest.

Most ambassadors from Vasilinople retire only a few years after being appointed, church and state are inseparable in their influence on education, Emperor Andronikos V reduces citizens' commute times by giving away their homes, and administrative districts are increasingly defined by their taste in housing architecture. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Vasilinople's national animal is the Eastern Imperial Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Eastern Orthodox Christianity.

Vasilinople is ranked 250,263^rd in the world and 24^th in The Alliance of Dictators for Most Primitive, scoring -151.9 on the Scary Big Number Scale.