The Colony of Vorticavia is a titanic, safe nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 24.52 billion Vorticavians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The relatively small government is primarily concerned with Spirituality, with Law & Order and Defense also on the agenda, while International Aid isn't funded at all. The average income tax rate is 9.5%.

The strong Vorticavian economy, worth a remarkable 1,623 trillion lire a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Furniture Restoration, Woodchip Exports, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 66,195 lire, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Leader has just been declared ruler of Vorticavia in an international press conference, body doubles and armed bodyguards escort witnesses to and from courtrooms, parents tell their children 'what a lovely mistake you turned out to be', and the "right of sanctuary" stops police pursuit into temples and churches. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low. Vorticavia's national animal is the salamander, which can occasionally be seen avoiding garbage in the nation's murky oceans.

Vorticavia is ranked 258,737^th in the world and 12^th in Vortex for Nicest Citizens, with 8.23 average smiles per day.