The County of Whatcom is a titanic, efficient nation, notable for its compulsory military service and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 17.175 billion Whatcomians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The tiny, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bellingham. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.2%.

The very strong Whatcomian economy, worth a remarkable 1,069 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with significant contributions from Cheese Exports, Woodchip Exports, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 62,268 dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 195,576 per year while the poor average 15,179, a ratio of 12.9 to 1.

Coffee-addicted citizens look forward to baristas getting their name wrong at local coffee shops, Leader has just been declared ruler of Whatcom in an international press conference, a major religion has been named as Whatcom's national religion, and the WhoTube comments section has gone strangely quiet. Crime is a problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Whatcom's national animal is the eagle, which can occasionally be seen dodging aircraft in the nation's cities.

Whatcom is ranked 131,632^nd in the world and 137^th in Equilism for Most Cultured, scoring 64 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.