The Republic of -Astoria is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Prime Minister Robert Paisley with a fair hand, and notable for its daily referendums, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 10.997 billion Astorians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Liskerry. The average income tax rate is 81.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Astorian economy, worth 895 trillion pynts a year, is quite specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism. Average income is 81,402 pynts, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Tourists call Astorian beach towns "the fine coastline", companies have begun running campaigns to stop people from remembering their brand name, weird kids who eat bugs are breaking the law, and funerals are often rudely interrupted by juggling clowns shouting for volunteers from the audience. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. -Astoria's national animal is the marten, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

-Astoria is ranked 40,693^rd in the world and 31^st in International Democratic Union for Lowest Crime Rates, with 77.41 law-abiding acts per hour.