The Republic of 96 Card Manufacturing Factory is a colossal, safe nation, notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, unlimited-speed roads, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate population of 3.063 billion 96 Card Manufacturing Factoryians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while International Aid and Environment aren't funded at all. The average income tax rate is 26.8%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The 96 Card Manufacturing Factoryian economy, worth 109 trillion bitcoins a year, is quite specialized and led by the Automobile Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Soda Sales, and Basket Weaving. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 35,750 bitcoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

Country folk are sent to obligatory boarding schools to learn how to be civilized, eight-year-olds with lemonade stands have been known to be locked up on charges of embezzlement, prisoners can't do number twos without their "toilet buddy" present, and money is being desperately pumped into the ruined economy. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. 96 Card Manufacturing Factory's national animal is the bison, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

96 Card Manufacturing Factory is ranked 261,921^st in the world and 201^st in One for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring zero on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.