The Republic of Canaltian North is a gargantuan, orderly nation, renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 10.287 billion Canaltian Northians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Industry. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 74.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Canaltian Northian economy, worth a remarkable 1,348 trillion ice chips a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 131,042 ice chips, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 375,716 per year while the poor average 36,364, a ratio of 10.3 to 1.

Science centers and state of the art laboratories are ubiquitous, citizens seem fixated on 105m x 45m rectangles, the nation's youth is held blameless for all crimes, and a ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect. Crime, especially youth-related, is a problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Canaltian North's national animal is the polar bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Canaltian North is ranked 285,260^th in the world and 10,717^th in Osiris for Highest Food Quality, scoring 4.76 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.