by Max Barry

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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rdLargest Insurance Industry: 4thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 6th
The Popsicle Pete Nation of
Iron Fist Consumerists
NONE OF YOU ARE SAFE!
Influence
Shoeshiner
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Clench

Population39.456 billion

CapitalJoseph City
LeaderJoseph
FaithJosephism

Currencymoney
Animalviper

The Popsicle Pete Nation of Clench is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Joseph with an iron fist, and remarkable for its triple-decker prams, aversion to nipples, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 39.456 billion follower of Josephs are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Joseph City. The average income tax rate is 98.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Josephic economy, worth an astonishing 41,166 trillion monies a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 1,043,352 monies, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,748,317 per year while the poor average 140,151, a ratio of 33.9 to 1.

An increasing number of citizens believe the world is flat, industry tycoons rarely hide their misdeeds due to the government's habit of bailing them out, punk rockers smash it up and then clean it up, and directors of low-budget sci-fi films are flocking to use Joseph City as a backdrop. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Clench's national animal is the viper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Josephism.

Clench is ranked 487th in the world and 25th in the Rejected Realms for Lowest Crime Rates, with 198.38 law-abiding acts per hour.

Top
1%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rdLargest Insurance Industry: 4thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 6thLargest Mining Sector: 7thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 18thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 19thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 21stLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 22ndLargest Agricultural Sector: 36thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 44thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 101stMost Corrupt Governments: 200thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 214thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 222ndLargest Governments: 230thMost Subsidized Industry: 300thMost Efficient Economies: 333rdMost Advanced Public Transport: 342ndFattest Citizens: 372ndLowest Crime Rates: 487thLargest Retail Industry: 1,246thLargest Populations: 1,348thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,856thMost Scientifically Advanced: 2,030thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,487thTop
5%
Largest Information Technology Sector: 5,151stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 5,576thRudest Citizens: 6,747thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 7,010thTop
10%
Most Devout: 15,565thSmartest Citizens: 18,064thLargest Publishing Industry: 18,241stMost Conservative: 21,251st
Top
1%
Largest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 6th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 10th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 13th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 14th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 17th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 17th in the regionLargest Governments: 18th in the regionFattest Citizens: 25th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 25th in the regionLargest Populations: 37th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 54th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 63rd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 67th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 73rd in the regionTop
5%
Largest Information Technology Sector: 143rd in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 150th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 150th in the regionRudest Citizens: 185th in the regionTop
10%
Most Devout: 430th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 435th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 448th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 462nd in the regionMost Conservative: 622nd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Devout.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Devout.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Devout.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Devout.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Devout.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Devout.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Survivors.
  • : Clench was ravaged by a Zombie Thing Horde from The Շ๏אเς ђєɭɭรςคקє of Trash Heap, infecting 187 million survivors and converting to a zombie exporter! Oh no!
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Authoritarian.

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