The United Socialist States of Coloamerica is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Czar Alekzandr with an even hand, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, unlimited-speed roads, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 22.137 billion Coloamericans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Coloamerica City. The average income tax rate is 81.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Coloamerican economy, worth a remarkable 1,449 trillion United Socialist Dollars a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Pizza Delivery. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 65,466 United Socialist Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Appendix transplant figures have recently doubled, the government violently suppresses separatist movements, tower block residents are each held responsible for four square inches of front lawn, and the military invades any neighboring nation with the gall to criticize its policies. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Coloamerica's national animal is the The Filthy Bourgeoisie, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Holy Coloamerican Catholicism.

Coloamerica is ranked 247,026^th in the world and 8,431^st in Lazarus for Most Primitive, scoring -142.9 on the Scary Big Number Scale.