The Cayon Special Missionary of Diplomaticia is a titanic, safe nation, ruled by UCL Seiteita Deril Gaelida with an even hand, and renowned for its public floggings, compulsory military service, and frequent executions. The democratic, devout population of 10.845 billion Diplomaticians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Malla Deplaytèa. The average income tax rate is 23.0%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Diplomatician economy, worth 548 trillion Nulcranis a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Cheese Exports, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 50,577 Nulcranis, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Professional athletes juggle part-time jobs to avoid bankruptcy, diplomatic missions typically end with a flurry of childish insults, accusations and phlegm, voting is voluntary, and biker gangs and fashionistas are converting to Violetism en masse. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Diplomaticia's national animal is the Avren Crane, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities, and its national religion is Naelitaism.

Diplomaticia is ranked 115,384^th in the world and 14^th in Sub Pacific for Nicest Citizens, with 13.62 average smiles per day.