The Kingdom of Ekpatanus is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Sam Michaelidis with an even hand, and notable for its otherworldly petting zoo, sprawling nuclear power plants, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 3.436 billion Ekpatanusians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kestrahaim. The average income tax rate is 48.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Ekpatanusian economy, worth 584 trillion Drachmas a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 170,094 Drachmas, with the richest citizens earning 5.0 times as much as the poorest.

More citizens have access to Maxtopian Grass than clean drinking water, dictators have dubbed Ekpatanus the land of lunatics, residents are readily ratting out rats in restaurants, and credit scores fluctuate wildly with every change of government. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ekpatanus's national animal is the Golden eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Orthodox Christianity.

Ekpatanus is ranked 10,818^th in the world and 7^th in Corsair for Most Developed, scoring 90.3 on the Human Development Index.