The Holy Empire of Elbelhalis is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Auden Bradleye with an iron fist, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, prohibition of alcohol, and enforced nudity. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 1.489 billion Elbelhalisians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Administration, Education, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Social Policy and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Phecridge. The average income tax rate is 70.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Elbelhalisian economy, worth 274 trillion pesos a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 184,620 pesos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.9 times as much as the poorest.

The crispy fried liver of a lion is prized as a tasty treat by vagrants, soldiers stream their classified military operations live for millions of fans, children who believe in the tooth fairy are frequently shipped off to Bigtopia, and Loud Patriotic Music Day has been ranked the seventh best new holiday of the year. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Elbelhalis's national animal is the lion, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Elbelhalis is ranked 180,108^th in the world and 120^th in The Order of the Grey Wardens for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 95.63 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.