The Colony of Eshavanar is a mammoth, socially progressive nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-working, cynical, devout population of 8.588 billion Eshavanarians are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, pro-business, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Spirituality, with Defense, Law & Order, and International Aid also on the agenda, while Environment and Industry receive no funds. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 5.9%.

The Eshavanarian economy, worth 425 trillion lire a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Basket Weaving, Arms Manufacturing, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 49,593 lire, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 319,634 per year while the poor average 3,108, a ratio of 102 to 1.

Crime is a problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Eshavanar's national animal is the ermine, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Eshavanar is ranked 312,974^th in the world and 62^nd in Colonies for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -7.07 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.