The Schbungus of Fifee is a mammoth, cultured nation, ruled by schmoon with an iron fist, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, zero percent divorce rate, and strictly enforced bedtime. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 5.519 billion fifeeans are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Education also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lincedon. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 32.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Fifeean economy, worth 916 trillion Yap Marks a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 166,019 Yap Marks, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 511,043 per year while the poor average 41,665, a ratio of 12.3 to 1.

Other worlds are informed of limited-time sales millennia after they conclude, street cleaners are noticeably glum during jubilee celebrations, potatoes are known for their lead aftertaste, and genuine Borhols and Bonkskys can be found in every museum. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Fifee's national animal is the mole, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is God believers.

Fifee is ranked 328,175^th in the world and 17,625^th in Lazarus for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -15.49 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.