by Max Barry

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Largest Welfare Programs: 2,593rdHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 3,884thMost Devout: 5,281st
The Lýderal Dáxlamic Metropolis of
Corrupt Dictatorship
Faith won't fail!
Influence
Shoeshiner
Region
Civil Rights
Below Average
Economy
All-Consuming
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

First Parish

Population14.761 billion

CapitalFirst Parish
LeaderLýderis Bradford John
FaithDáxlam

CurrencyDáxlamic Mark
AnimalJumping Fox

The Lýderal Dáxlamic Metropolis of First Parish is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Lýderis Bradford John with an iron fist, and notable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, frequent executions, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 14.761 billion First Parishioners are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of First Parish. The average income tax rate is 91.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming First Parishian economy, worth a remarkable 1,574 trillion Dáxlamic Marks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Cheese Exports. Average income is an impressive 106,664 Dáxlamic Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Search-and-rescue organisations are the biggest employer in the country, census workers struggle to account for the rapidly increasing number of citizens to tabulate, the number of eyes rolled per maths lesson is increasing exponentially, and sales of superhero insurance have skyrocketed after the government abandoned the police in favor of vigilantes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. First Parish's national animal is the Jumping Fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Dáxlam.

First Parish is ranked 141,890th in the world and 35th in Declansburg for Largest Black Market, with 1.29 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

Top
1%
Largest Welfare Programs: 2,593rdTop
5%
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 3,884thMost Devout: 5,281stMost Compassionate Citizens: 5,350thNicest Citizens: 5,729thMost Advanced Public Transport: 6,189thMost Pacifist: 6,353rdMost Accessible: 6,686thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 7,480thMost Inclusive: 8,271stHighest Average Tax Rates: 8,840thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 9,922ndMost Advanced Public Education: 11,188thMost Cultured: 11,488thHighest Food Quality: 11,638thLargest Publishing Industry: 11,824thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 12,832ndMost Cheerful Citizens: 14,499thMost Beautiful Environments: 15,322ndTop
10%
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 17,578thLargest Governments: 17,611thLongest Average Lifespans: 20,739thHighest Poor Incomes: 21,183rdHighest Economic Output: 22,057thMost Income Equality: 26,850thLargest Populations: 30,881stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 31,034thLowest Crime Rates: 32,300th
Top
5%
Largest Welfare Programs: 6th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 8th in the regionTop
10%
Most Devout: 10th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 11th in the regionMost Pacifist: 12th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 14th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 14th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 15th in the regionLargest Populations: 16th in the regionNicest Citizens: 17th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Lowest Crime Rates.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : First Parish was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens.
  • : First Parish's influence in Declansburg rose from "Zero" to "Shoeshiner".
  • : First Parish relocated from Lazarus to Declansburg.
  • : Following new legislation in First Parish, sales of superhero insurance have skyrocketed after the government abandoned the police in favor of vigilantes.
  • : Following new legislation in First Parish, the number of eyes rolled per maths lesson is increasing exponentially.
  • : Following new legislation in First Parish, census workers struggle to account for the rapidly increasing number of citizens to tabulate.

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