The Teenage Heartthrob of Joey is a mammoth, pleasant nation, ruled by Ben Herman with an even hand, and remarkable for its public floggings, free-roaming dinosaurs, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, devout population of 9.653 billion Joeyians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and look forward to their next free and open election, to be held on an as-yet unannounced date.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Welfare. The average income tax rate is 48.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Joeyian economy, worth 309 trillion bitcoins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, quite specialized black market in Woodchip Exports, Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 32,109 bitcoins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Annulments are on the rise as couples discover their ancestors were born in the same hospitals, child shoplifters spend half their youth behind bars, what goes down must come up, and the government confiscates candy from babies for 'the greater good' of the nation. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Joey's national animal is the eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Joey is ranked 268,155^th in the world and 8^th in Britannia Prima for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -3.16 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.