The Ancient Elefante of Jonewest is a gargantuan, safe nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service, keen interest in outer space, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 25.974 billion Jonewestians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. The average income tax rate is 68.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Jonewestian economy, worth a remarkable 1,955 trillion Barcodes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Arms Manufacturing, and Trout Farming. Average income is 75,280 Barcodes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

Abortion is only legal in unusual circumstances, the nation is currently revamping its entire education system, children have taken to using semaphore in light of the recent mobile phone ban, and cremation is compulsory for the deceased. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Jonewest's national animal is the Elefante, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Jonewest is ranked 34,537^th in the world and 2^nd in Solstice for Fattest Citizens, with 14.99 Obesity Rate.