The People's Republic of Oahu is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Dick Blandishment with a fair hand, and renowned for its smutty television, feral children, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, democratic, humorless population of 32.315 billion Oahuans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Honolulu. The average income tax rate is 4.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Oahuan economy, worth a remarkable 6,773 trillion kalas a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 209,618 kalas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government subsidizes those who produce the worst results, job descriptions are required to list the length of their siesta breaks, the Oahuan Intelligence Agency relies on internet search engines to know what is happening overseas, and death is nobody's business. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Oahu's national animal is the tower crane, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The Order of Violet.

Oahu is ranked 69,441^st in the world and 2^nd in Oahu for Safest, scoring 96.1 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.