The República Parlamentar of Ossela is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by António Freitas with a fair hand, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, infamous sell-swords, and national health service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 8.165 billion Osselanos enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized, corrupt, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Barmúim. The average income tax rate is 33.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Osselano economy, worth a remarkable 1,229 trillion Escudo Osselanoes a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 150,552 Escudo Osselanoes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Lobotomies haven't been the same after the practice was severed, the parliament building has installed a revolving door, volunteers are signing up to take arms against an incursion of flesh-eating zombies (Ossela has found 2 easter eggs), and city sidewalks are crowded with overweight people. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Ossela's national animal is the Gato, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Catolicismo Romano.

Ossela is ranked 265,661^st in the world and 74^th in Portugal for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 26.58 on the Bus Surprisal Index.