The Empire of Primikk is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Johnathan Smalls with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, ubiquitous missile silos, and enslaved workforce. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 17.284 billion Primikkians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Primise. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 74.3%.

The strong Primikkian economy, worth a remarkable 1,274 trillion nimecks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Trout Farming, and Information Technology. Average income is 73,750 nimecks, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 208,768 per year while the poor average 20,832, a ratio of 10.0 to 1.

Scoutmasters debate whether luxury log cabins defeat the purpose of camping, military information leaks are **REDACTED** by **REDACTED** in **REDACTED**, the new foreign policy is "why bother invading neighbours when they can be bought wholesale?", and anything is permissible when wearing latex gloves. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Primikk's national animal is the Squirrel, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Tuesdayism.

Primikk is ranked 201,815^th in the world and 4^th in Urana Firma for Highest Poor Incomes, with 20,832.72 Standard Monetary Units.