The Benevolent Glorius Queendom of Scorched Ice is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Queen Verglaspire with an even hand, and renowned for its daily referendums, public floggings, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate population of 10.905 billion Scorched Iceans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Brumal. The average income tax rate is 77.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Scorched Icean economy, worth 825 trillion Coins a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 75,683 Coins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Bemused citizens are encouraged to sing foreign-language hymns of religions they have never heard of, sex offenders find themselves cut off from the ability to repeat their crimes, the Ministry of Health has reported a sharp increase in the incidence of delayed menopause, and internet searches for the inventor of the three-wheeled steam-powered Scorched Icean weed picker are way up. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Scorched Ice's national animal is the Frost Viper, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Scorched Ice is ranked 115,019^th in the world and 3,814^th in Osiris for Most Primitive, scoring -30.05 on the Scary Big Number Scale.