The Armed Republic of Stainus is a massive, orderly nation, remarkable for its strictly enforced bedtime, vat-grown people, and state-planned economy. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 1.626 billion Stainusians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Education. The average income tax rate is 81.4%.

The all-consuming Stainusian economy, worth 145 trillion rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, highly specialized black market in Trout Farming, Cheese Exports, Uranium Mining, and Soda Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 89,396 rubles, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Graffiti artists make up a significant portion of the coal mining population, schoolchildren tunnel out to skip classes, Stainusian watches list strained wrists as a common side effect, and the citizenship exam requires years of study to actually pass. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Stainus's national animal is the sheep, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Stainus is ranked 16,917^th in the world and 5^th in Solvang for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 3,727.84 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.