The Empiric Republic of Techitia is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Buhab Joskisk with an even hand, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, national health service, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 1.392 billion Techitians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tassak Al' Ayan. The average income tax rate is 51.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Techitian economy, worth 95.4 trillion Pacifican Renes a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Trout Farming, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is notable. Average income is 68,521 Pacifican Renes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

School lockers are filled with fancy underwear, people caught mistreating Techitia's flag generally wind up in a great deal of pain, business ambassadors offer bong tokes to foreign leaders, and children are often punished for the sins of the fathers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Techitia's national animal is the Turkey butt, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Atheism.

Techitia is ranked 96,397^th in the world and 6^th in Terra Pacis for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 949.65 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.