The Commune of The Free Lands of Lothlorien is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by President Yakashama with a fair hand, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, otherworldly petting zoo, and compulsory gun ownership. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 15.986 billion Lothlorieners are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Amasakaya. The average income tax rate is 97.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Free Lothlorien economy, worth a remarkable 3,667 trillion Dulvas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 229,398 Dulvas, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Family isn't who you're born with but who you abandon in foreign countries, preschools put children down for naps with milk, cookies, and a gruesome story of vengeance, forgetting to pay your annual passport bill is a leading cause of deportations, and The Pipe Bomb Makers' Pop-Up Book can be found in preschool libraries. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. The Free Lands of Lothlorien's national animal is the Tiger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Cult of Progress.

The Free Lands of Lothlorien is ranked 4,994^th in the world and 11^th in Spiritus for Most Beautiful Environments, with 2,348.4 pounds of wildlife per square mile.