The Sovereign University of Zetaopalatopia is a titanic, socially progressive nation, ruled by Edwin Elwood with an even hand, and remarkable for its digital currency, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 22.596 billion Zetaopalatopians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The enormous government prioritizes Education, with Environment, Healthcare, and Social Policy also on the agenda, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Administration. The average income tax rate is 99.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Zetaopalatopian economy, worth a remarkable 4,824 trillion Merits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 213,530 Merits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Goldilocks has found a lucrative career as a zoning consultant, waste collection professionals have been canned, people with dyslexia are told to tough through it, and theories that hold water are considered to have failed. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Zetaopalatopia's national animal is the Timber Wolf, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The Cult of The Hidden Moon.

Zetaopalatopia is ranked 258,762^nd in the world and 13,493^rd in Lazarus for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -3.79 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.