The Constitutional Monarchy of Eistalia is a huge, efficient nation, notable for its smutty television, national health service, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 572 million Eistalians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Königsfeld. The average income tax rate is 46.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Eistalian economy, worth 59.9 trillion Euros a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 104,656 Euros, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

A typical fast food menu item could serve a small army, sections of the police receive paramilitary training, attendance of fathers at PTA meetings is at an all-time high, and Eistalia's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Eistalia's national animal is the Snowy Owl, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Eistalia is ranked 36,185^th in the world and 488^th in Europe for Safest, scoring 106.96 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.