The Bi-pin Lamp Standard of G9 is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its public floggings, pith helmet sales, and disturbing lack of elderly people. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 14.161 billion G9ians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Education, Law & Order, and Industry are also considered important. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 55.0%.

The frighteningly efficient G9ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,880 trillion Lumens a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Cheese Exports, and Furniture Restoration. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 132,765 Lumens, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 447,833 per year while the poor average 29,136, a ratio of 15.4 to 1.

The government has declared that sharing is uncaring, school football matches are usually five-a-side, livestock mutilations are on the rise, and police officers often head to work wearing onesies and fluffy pink bunny-slippers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. G9's national animal is the Electron, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

G9 is ranked 64,966^th in the world and 3,886^th in Lazarus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 70.86 law-abiding acts per hour.