The Inseparable Commonwealth of Kovistanka is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Rodimov Kushnir with an even hand, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, anti-smoking policies, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The compassionate population of 3.756 billion Kovistankans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kalastrofal. The average income tax rate is 93.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Kovish economy, worth 557 trillion Kovramarks a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Trout Farming, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 148,405 Kovramarks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The optimally efficient parking strategy for business commuters is referred to as the "traveling salesman problem", scientists on maritime expeditions return with a healthy glow, one can wake up in Kovistanka and have breakfast in Bigtopia, and people boast about their low income on their dating profiles. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kovistanka's national animal is the Ostrich, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Kovistanka is ranked 3,989^th in the world and 218^th in Lazarus for Safest, scoring 132.22 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.