The Empire of Valcouria is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Emperor Constantine I with an iron fist, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, pith helmet sales, and triple-decker prams. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 30.879 billion Valcourians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bainbridge. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Valcourian economy, worth an astonishing 13,112 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Retail, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 424,631 Dollars, with the richest citizens earning 7.0 times as much as the poorest.

Government policy is dictated by Roman Catholicism, nuclear submarines have been deployed to protect the nation's banana supply, pranking is an art form, and the homeless more often beg for mercy than money. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Valcouria's national animal is the White-tailed Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Valcouria is ranked 640^th in the world and 2^nd in Anteria for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 12,274.58 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.