The Kingdom of Albyion Kingdom is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Don Fluffles with an iron fist, and notable for its smutty television, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 11.139 billion Albyion Kingdomians are proud of their wide-ranging civil freedoms, and those who aren't tend to be dragged off the streets by men in dark suits and hustled into cars with tinted windows.

The relatively small, corrupt, liberal government prioritizes Education, although Administration, Industry, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of London. The average income tax rate is 59.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Albyion Kingdomian economy, worth a remarkable 2,996 trillion Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 268,987 Pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Murder rates are on the rise as the popularity of soylent products grows, mathematicians are gathering an infinite number of Lions and typewriters to see if they can recreate the works of Max Barry, there's never enough space in space, and Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Albyion Kingdom's national animal is the Lion, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Secularism.

Albyion Kingdom is ranked 7,960^th in the world and 164^th in the West Pacific for Safest, scoring 124.37 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.