The Armed Republic of Svanland is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Mikael Svan with an iron fist, and remarkable for its complete lack of prisons, compulsory military service, and daily referendums. The compassionate, cynical population of 16.363 billion Svanlandians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large government prioritizes Education, although Healthcare, Environment, and Defense are also considered important, while Spirituality is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Svancity. The average income tax rate is 93.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Svanlandian economy, worth a remarkable 2,814 trillion Pissetassars a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 171,996 Pissetassars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Billions of Pissetassars are being blown on orbital weapons development, protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations, diaper ads feature vertically-challenged adults wearing bootees, and military equipment is being auctioned off to extend comatose centenarians' lives. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Svanland's national animal is the Kakstare, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Svanland is ranked 133,542^nd in the world and 1,516^th in the West Pacific for Most Corrupt Governments, with 5.21 kickbacks per hour.