The United States of Zorgazia is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Xankriel Cerejo with an even hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, daily referendums, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 1.654 billion Zorgazians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Industry, Administration, and Education are also considered important, while International Aid and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Xandria. The average income tax rate is 54.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Zorgazian economy, worth 273 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 165,117 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Colonial subjects have Zorgazian culture shoved down their throats, camera crews have accompanied conscripted dancers to film 'Marching On Ice', confessions don't count if suffixed with "izzle", and recent events in Dàguó have been classified 'for Xankriel Cerejo's eyes only'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Zorgazia's national animal is the ICBM's, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Zorgazia is ranked 262,305^th in the world and 107^th in Sancturia for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -3.16 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.