The Federal Republic of Akhzin is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Jim Teacher with a fair hand, and remarkable for its otherworldly petting zoo, vat-grown people, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, democratic population of 2.844 billion Akhzis love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The large, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Croydon. The average income tax rate is 89.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Akhzinian economy, worth 472 trillion Drovaks a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 166,226 Drovaks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

National parks have long lines of different gender-specific 'Porta-Pottys', female newsreaders distract the nation by breastfeeding during broadcast, Jim Teacher's new door-knocking campaign has the sweet taste of success, and in coastal waters there are fifteen salvage divers per dead man's chest (yo ho ho). Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Akhzin's national animal is the Dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Akhzin is ranked 8,637^th in the world and 22^nd in The Kodiak Republic for Most Cultured, scoring 122 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.