The Democratic States of Kiaville is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Kia with an even hand, and notable for its compulsory vegetarianism, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 18.355 billion Kiavilleans enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Environment, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kiatown. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Kiavillean economy, worth a remarkable 5,651 trillion Kronor a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 307,880 Kronor, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nationalised Arms Manufacturing Industry is not interested in making weapons, pulling weeds is seen as a threat to national security, the phrase 'spreading like wildfire' is no longer in the public lexicon, and the restriction that you must be over 1.1 metres tall to ride a carnotaurus has recently been waived. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kiaville's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Kiaville is ranked 287,943^rd in the world and 4,070^th in the Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -539.17 on the Scary Big Number Scale.