The United Socialist States of North Goiky is a huge, cultured nation, notable for its otherworldly petting zoo, state-planned economy, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, democratic population of 251 million Goikians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 76.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Goikian economy, worth 20.0 trillion Trade-tokens a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 79,776 Trade-tokens, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation operates a "finders-keepers" policy with other nations' citizens, ADHD now stands for Attention Distracted by Hardware Devices, graverobbers claim they're acting within the interest of 'scientific preservation', and from the highest mountain to the deepest cave - one can always count on finding a good cell signal in North Goiky. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. North Goiky's national animal is the Davidian, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

North Goiky is ranked 46,965^th in the world and 504^th in The Communist Bloc for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 4,131.99 on the Gilded Widget Scale.