The Greater Federal Republic of Xi Lan is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Federal Council with an even hand, and notable for its state-planned economy, otherworldly petting zoo, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate population of 1.063 billion Xi Lanics are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Li Anqui. The average income tax rate is 90.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Xi Lanian economy, worth 165 trillion Temis a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 155,917 Temis, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Wealthy pranksters dump refuse on unsuspecting citizens from up high, farting etiquette is taught in schools, parking lots are littered with coffee cups and doughnut crumbs, and students memorise knock-knock jokes for their mandatory twice-a-term Comedy Examinations. Crime is totally unknown. Xi Lan's national animal is the Yani Collared Dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is State Atheism.

Xi Lan is ranked 7,542^nd in the world and 106^th in The Leftist Assembly for Most Developed, scoring 92.31 on the Human Development Index.