The Kingdom of Tramolvalnia is a mammoth, genial nation, ruled by King Heron with an even hand, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 8.829 billion Tramolvalnians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cornelești. The average income tax rate is 93.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Tramolvalnian economy, worth a remarkable 1,077 trillion Cookies a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 122,018 Cookies, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Nature reserves often contain artificial waterfalls and concrete paths, trust-fund babies line up for places in community college, imitation is the sincerest form of felony, and confessions don't count if suffixed with "izzle". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tramolvalnia's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Tramolvalnia is ranked 300,038^th in the world and 318^th in 10000 Islands for Fattest Citizens, with 4.66 Obesity Rate.