The Updocs of Spaynia is a massive, genial nation, renowned for its unlimited-speed roads, keen interest in outer space, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 1.357 billion Spaynians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Penguinoville. The average income tax rate is 68.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Spaynian economy, worth 115 trillion Pesos a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is dominated by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 84,816 Pesos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Max Barry is this year's Miss Spaynia, people stand their fridges back-to-front to benefit from the free heating, embarrassed police officers wear spandex and carry net guns, and popular cartoon characters frequently appear in government-sponsored PSAs reminding students to say no to drugs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Spaynia's national animal is the penguin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Spaynia is ranked 220,577^th in the world and 3,417^th in The North Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 8.74 Obesity Rate.