The Ex-Country Pirate gang of Sloventa is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by The Sloventian Council with an even hand, and renowned for its national health service, zero percent divorce rate, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate population of 9.664 billion Celtiberians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Danica. The average income tax rate is 95.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Celtiberian economy, worth a remarkable 1,306 trillion Euros a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 135,195 Euros, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Diplomatic missions are often mistaken as declarations of war, mosh pits are a common phenomenon in The Sloventian Council's political rallies, the government single-handedly sustains the bunk bed market, and recreational drug businesses are regularly pruned if they grow above the maximum legal size. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sloventa's national animal is the Sloventain Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Multiple Religous Dominations.

Sloventa is ranked 259,057^th in the world and 723^rd in Europe for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -3.79 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.